“Whutch-you talkin’ ’bout Willis?”

“We have not passed that subtle line between childhood and adulthood until… we have stopped saying “It got lost,” and say “I lost it.””
–Sydney J. Harris

They say it happens gradually. Somewhere in your twenties, between going to university and getting your first job and apartment you learn, slowly, subtly, through practice and necessity, how to function as an adult. I however did not go to University, and adulthood certainly did not happen gradually or subtly. It instead happened all at once, with all the subtlety of a brick in the small of your back.

7 Signs that you’re an Adult

1. You pay for things you can’t hold in your hands.

2. You feel the emotion: Shame.

3.  People don’t think it’s cute when you fuck up.

4. You stop receiving handwritten mail

5. You have to wake yourself up on time

6.  You choose to wear sweaters

7. You worry about not getting a Boner


At this time last year,  was 20, single, living at home and working 12 hours a week in a local bowling alley. Food was put on the table every night for me, rent and bills were paid without me ever even being aware of it.  My entire wage packet went on luxuries and night’s out.  The Blissful life of a teenager. I can admit, without any hesitation, I was ungrateful for what I had, this is not to say I treated my Mother badly, or in any way close to it, only that, now having experienced the effort and time all these things take I look back and realize just what my Mother gave me and how difficult that is to do, and I now believe nothing short or kissing the ground she walked on would have sufficed, for I could not do what she has done for the past 20 years of my existence, and certainly not with the calm cool temperament she does.  However I derail from the point. The point here is the different 12 much too short months can make in life.

Today, one year later, the picture is very different.

I’m now 21, and living in a house I rent with my Fiance, Aaron Dembski-Bowden. I now pay my half of all the house bills and repairs and food and travel and car expenses. I run a part-time business in Photography, and up until this week have worked a15 hour week in retail although this was a placeholder and bill-payer until I got a job I wanted, which I now have, I sign a contract on Monday to work full-time in a Nursery/pre-school. Within 12 months I have learned to pay bills, get jobs, budget, run, manage and maintain a house, clean, cook, change fuses, unfreeze and unblock pipes and drains. Adulthood was not what I expected.

To me, being grown-up meant smoking cigarettes, drinking cocktails, and dressing up in high heels and glamourous outfits. – Lorna Luft

To be honest, I do all these things, but I do them much less than I thought I would, thank you recession. When your a kid you seem to glass over the nitty-gritty of being grown up and focus on just the nice parts. Like naming your own bed-time, dessert before dinner, and left over Chinese for breakfast.  I think one of the things I struggled with most was ‘Paying for things you can’t hold’, like electricity, and heat, and rent. I have this preset view of them ‘just being there’, but they aren’t and they cost a surprising a mount of money to have.  To Conquer this I tried, while paying my rent and bills to remind myself that I’m not paying for nothing, but am in fact paying for the privileged of having ‘my own place’ and the right to make my own decisions about and within it. However, it still has that salty tang of disappointment you get at 7, when your aunt’s Christmas present is socks and a homemade sweater and not a new Barbie set.

You Know You’re No Longer A Kid When

  • Just one peanut butter and jelly sandwich doesn’t do it any more.
  • Driving a car doesn’t always sound like fun.
  • Being bad is no longer cool.
  • You have friends who have kids.
  • Saturday mornings are for sleeping.
  • Your parents’ jokes are now funny.
  • You have once said, “Whutch-you talkin’ ’bout Willis?”
  • You would rather wear your dirty clothes again, ’cause mom is not there to do your laundry anymore.
  • Two words: parachute pants
  • Naps are good.
  • Hitting girls is no longer considered flirting.
  • You have once deemed Space Invaders as “the best game ever.”
  • When things go wrong, you can’t just yell, “Do-over!”
  • The only thing in your cereal box is … cereal.
  • You actually buy scarves, gloves, and sunscreen.
  • Your idea of fun parties now include chips ‘n’ salsa and Snapple.
  • You leave concerts and ballgames early to beat the crowd.
  • You WANT clothes for Christmas.
  • You don’t want a Camaro because of the insurance premiums.
  • You’ve bought an album on vinyl.
  • You remember seeing Star Wars when it first came out.

None the less you get up and get on with it and get things done, and though it might not fit your glamorous idea’s of adulthood, you go to work, you come home, you make the dinner and you clean the house. Because at the end of the day, there’s something to be said for the subtle joy of waking up in the morning, in your own bed, in your own house, and laying there an extra few minutes, just because you can to watch your loved one sleep.  This is my secret joy, Aaron sleeping is one of my favorite moments of my day, he looks beautiful asleep, calm, content and at peace.

”After that he didn’t talk so much about events as he did about ideas. And the older I got, the more philosophical he seemed to get. I don’t know if he really got more philosophical or if he just thought I could handle it now that I was in the double digits. Mostly the thing he talked about floated around me, but once in a while something would happen and I would understand exactly what he meant. “A painting is more than the sum of its parts,” he would tell me, and then go on to explain how a cow by itself is just a cow, and the meadow by itself is just grass and flowers, and the sun peeking through the trees is just a beam of light, but put them all together and you’ve got magic.”


Published in: on January 29, 2010 at 2:36 pm  Comments (2)  
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